


I can’t live without you.

by Iloveyourfreckles



Category: Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them (Movies)
Genre: Confession, Danger, F/M, Family, Feelings, Friendship, Hurt/Comfort, I Love You, London, Love, MACUSA | Magical Congress of the United States of America, Ministry of Magic, New York City, Trip - Freeform, beasts - Freeform, dilemma, duty & love, friends - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-05
Updated: 2019-05-18
Packaged: 2020-02-26 13:11:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 10,016
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18717739
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Iloveyourfreckles/pseuds/Iloveyourfreckles
Summary: After a long and hard day at work, Tina is relaxing when an urgent letter from MACUSA is arriving later this evening . But when she entered the office, it absolutely isn't what she expected...





	1. Part one: New York

**Author's Note:**

> Author's note: Hello, everyone. For those who don't know me, I am French and I already have published some stories here . So, it will be the third one. this one will have three parts.  
> I just ask you to be understanding if there are some grammar mistakes. English is not my native language and no one is reading and correcting my latest stories.  
> You have to know that this story doesn't follow The Crimes of Grindelwald even if i have seen the movie twice and i immensely enjoyed it. I had this idea in my head and I had to write it down.  
> So here you go.  
> Read and comment, please.  
> Enjoy!  
> Disclaimer: I am not J. K. Rowling so I don't own any of this .

               It was a beautiful sunny day in New York. A lovely brunette came out of the Woolworth building. She wore a light grey pants and a white blouse, holding a long black leather coat. Her hair was black and short, square cut and plunge. A fringe covered her forehead. She slipped a lock of hair behind one of her ears. This gesture made her smile reminding her of a certain English kind man that occupied her thoughts since his return to London. She took over the direction of her flat. The streets were very crowded with this lovely weather but she didn't pay attention. She had a long and hard day at work and she wanted to be home to relax. Her sister will probably wait for her with a coffee and some pastries from Jacob Kowalki's bakery. Her sister only bought her bread and pastries there now. The young woman knew that it was her sister's excuse to see the baker.

At last, she was there. She passed the concierge 's lodge without making any noise. When she entered, silence hit her. The flat was empty which was odd because Queenie should be here. But she wasn't worried, Queenie had probably changed her plan to go see Jacob. So, she will make the most of her loneliness by taking a long and hot bath. After this tired and long day, she deserved it and she wasn't going to deprive herself of it. She went to her bedroom and retrieved a book on the bedtime table .

She went back to the bathroom, put the book on the little wood stool right next to the bathtub. As the water filled it up, she prepared herself. As she entered the hot and foamed water, she released a long sigh of relief. After settling down comfortably, she grabbed the book on the little stool. It was a black leather cover book whose golden creatures were decorating the front cover just as the title in golden letters too: _Fantastic Beasts and where to find Them_. She stroked it with her fingertips, the candle's lights made them shine. A beautiful smile appeared then, it was one of pride and love. Next, she opened it and took a piece of paper folded on four.

She began to read it.

 

**_London, 24th April 1928_ **

**_My dear Tina,_ **

**_I haven't much time to write to you so I am sorry but it only is a short note. Anyway, I wanted you to know that I will travel for a few weeks in Burkina Faso. I have some new researches to do about Runspoors . I need some updates for the next edition of my book. I won't probably be able to give you some news, so please don't worry about my silence, I will be immersed in my work. As soon as I came back, I will write to you right away and give you news._ **

**_During this time, take care of you, of Jacob and Queenie._ **

**_I miss you._ **

**_Yours truly,_ **

**_Newt_ **

 

She caressed his signature, she missed him too. She folded and pulled it back inside the book and turned the pages to find what it was saying about the runpoor. She, of course, knew it for reading Newt's book several times but once more she wanted to be sure. Maybe she was wrong or she had mixed her knowledges with another beast. She read again but sadly her brain remembered very well the article and she sighed. It had taken him more time than he had told in this letter because it was middle of June and she hadn't received any news from him since then.

So, she decided to put one of his advice into practice: "My philosophy is that worrying means suffer twice." She could perfectly hear him saying that to her with his beautiful English accent and his sweet and modulated voice. Her heart ached as she thought about him but he had asked her not to worry so she decided to be patient and wait. After all, he was very skilled with beasts and he knew his job even if sometimes he had no protectiveness about himself. He always put his beasts or the others before him, she already saw him with several bruises, cuts or things like that because he wanted that all was good for the animal. She pursued her reading through the pages remembering all the beautiful creatures she had met thanks to him. He had changed her point of view and her way of seeing each of them. She chuckled as she remembered their first meeting and that she had asked him if it was an extermination guide. How wrong she was, then! Now, she had understood how lucky she was to have met him, to have shared some beautiful moments in his case and to have the chance to finally know him better. But it was perfectly clear that he was more than a friend for her. Even if she hadn't told him, she was quite sure about her feelings for him. She had hoped several times when he came to see her that he would confess what he felt for her but he didn't. He was shy and sometimes clumsy with words so it really wasn't a surprise. But some gestures have told her that, what he felt for her, was more than friendship too. She just wished that things will go a little more quickly between them.

She pursued her reading through the pages even if she had already read it several times. She particularly stopped on the pages where were found the beasts to which she became the most attached like the bowtruckle, the Niffler or the Occamy.

She daydreamed like this for a while when she was drawn of it by her sister's voice.

"Teenie ? Are you here?" Queenie called.

"Yes, Queenie, in the bathroom."

"There is an owl for you from MACUSA and it is an urgent one." She pressed her.

"I come right away, Queenie."

She put down her book, get out of the bathtub taking her wand. She cast a drying spell on herself and dressed up quickly to join her sister in the living room.

She left the book on the bedtime table and found Queenie preparing a coffee as the letter from the MACUSA was waiting for her on the coffee table. She unfolded it and read it.

 

**_Miss Goldstein,_ **

**_I am waiting for you in my office as soon as you received this. This is urgent._ **

**_Mrs. Picquery._ **

 

"I have to go back to MACUSA. Madam President wants to see me, this is urgent." She told her sister as she took her black leather coat on the coat rack outgoing.

When she was in the street, she decided to look for a quiet place to apparate near the building. Like this, she quickly will know what happened.

When she was there, she urged inside in the direction of Madam President's office. She hardly saw anyone at that time.

Before knocking, she took a deep breath because she really didn't know what to expect, except that there will probably be some other aurors. She knocked.

"Come in." Mrs. Picquery said in a cold tone.

What a surprise, when she opened the door and discovered Mrs. Picquery alone.

"Ah Goldstein! Sit down! We need to talk."

Tina got really nervous. Why was she in her office alone? She didn't remember doing anything wrong in her latest cases. She looked at her hands on her knees waiting that she told her what she was doing here.

"I have some news for you which are not very good and pleasant to hear but I thought that you would probably want to know. I don't hate to be the bird of omen ill." She snapped.

Tina's thoughts were jostling for time, she couldn't stop imagine anything and everything. Then her superior opened a drawer of her desk and took something that she handed out to Tina. It was a roll-up newspaper, Tina unrolled it out discovering the newspaper's title: _The Daily Prophet_. Instantly, her mind went to London and a particular person. She put it flat on the desk and her heart stopped beating for a moment. A worst fear was just in front of her eyes. She began to read.

* * *

 

_The famous magizoologist and world-renowned Newt Scamander in coma._

_While we are writing these lines, we have just learned that the famous magizoologist Newton Scamander was the victim of an accident and was admitted in St Mungo for more than a month. We can't tell the circumstances because none of his family members wanted to answer our questions. For sure, one of his beloved and now famous beasts is probably at the origin of his condition._

_All we know is that he is seriously injured and in a coma._

_Sadly, it was certain that this would happen one day. His book shows us many beautiful creatures but just as dangerous. We sincerely hope that he will quickly recover and no sequelae._

* * *

 

_As soon as we have some other news, we will keep you informed._

She held back her tears not wanting to cry in front of her superior. She clenched her fists and looked at her straight in the eyes, very determined.

"I need some days off, Madam President, please."

"I am sorry, Miss Goldstein, but I have to refuse. There is too much cases at this moment."

"After all he has done for us last time, I think it is the least someone can do to visit him and take some news."

"You let your feelings cloud your judgement."

Tina was about to answer but Picquery cut her off.

"My answer is no and it is definitive. That's all for tonight, you can leave. I have a lot of work to do tonight. Goodnight Miss Goldstein." She dismissed her in a dry tone.

Tina didn't answer, got up very angry, strongly grasping the Daily Prophet and getting out quickly by violently slamming the door . She took a few steps and leaned against a wall, trembling. All this was a bit too much for only one person . A storm was roaring inside her and at the same time she was heartbroken. She opened the newspaper again and looked at the picture. Newt had a forced smile on his lovely freckled face, Tina could see his discomfort. She closed her eyes: _Please Newt, stay strong. I am coming._

She steadied herself against the wall, took a long breath and a brave look appeared on her face. She was going to London with or without Mrs. Picquery's permission.

She left the building and apparated in the little alley near their flat .She quickly went up the stairs and entered leaning against the door.

"Tina, what's going on?" Queenie asked when she saw the pain in her eyes and at the same time her clenched fists.

But her sister didn't say anything, she dropped the newspaper and the tears that she had been holding in Madam President's office fell. Queenie came over, picked the newspaper and guided toward the sofa.

After a few minutes, Tina finally calmed down, much to Queenie's relief. As she held her sister, she had read the article to better understand her distress and pain clearly could be read on her beautiful face. She felt pain for both her sister and the man she loved because she had learned to like him too.

Suddenly, Tina hastened to her feet.

"I can't stay like this, pitying myself. Mercy Lewis, I am an Auror. I will go to see him as I have decided." She stated with strength and determination.

Then she went to her room, retrieving her suitcase on the top of her wardrobe. She opened it and put some clothes and toiletries, Newt's book and a batch of letters. Queenie was there, looking intently at her as she could clearly read her mind.

"You should take a dress, just in case." simply said Queenie, always thinking about fashion even in these circumstances.

"I have no intention of going to a ball, Queen! I am going to see Newt, take care of him and I really don't know what will happen."

Queenie took the opportunity that Tina had turned to take a last look in her bedtime table; with a flip of her wand, she hid a beautiful velvet blue dress in the bottom of her suitcase. Tina would find it if she needed it. She was sure she would like it when she found out. It was a new one that she had created, just for her. Queenie knew that it would be an occasion or another for Tina to wear it.

"When are you leaving? "

"Tomorrow morning, I will take the first passager steamer which left New York to London. The no-maj transport is my only option as I am not allowed to go and if I ask for a portkey, I will be instantly spotted."

Queenie sighed.

"You will take care of you and say hi for me to Newt. Be careful, Tina, please. "

"I promise."

After that, the two sisters had dinner and went to bed early. The next day, Queenie accompanied her sister to the harbor, they exchanged a long hug and Tina boarded looking one last time at Queenie who had tears in her eyes while she waved at her.

**_To be continued ..._ **

 

 


	2. Part two : London

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tina has arrived in London. Her only thought is to find a way to go to see Newt ...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Author's note. Hello everyone. For those who don't know me, I am French. . I wanted to tell you that if there are some grammar mistakes, I am awfully sorry. I am trying my best to look for the grammar rules, the vocabulary but it is not always easy. I hope you won't be too hard on me. I am working hard on this story.
> 
> I also wanted to thank you for reading and letting some kudos . It means the world to me
> 
> Don’t hesitate to comment , I'd like to know what you thought about it.
> 
> Disclaimer: all this is not mine. I am not J.K. Rowling

 

She stood in the middle of the streets of London. The sky was grey with some impressive dark clouds. It was as if the weather was mirroring her mood and her thoughts. It would probably rain soon when she would reach the final destination of this trip and that she would perhaps cry when she would discover Newt's state.

She looked around her not knowing exactly what she wanted to do first or where to go. She felt lost and alone in this new town that she didn't know and where she really knew only one person. She had imagined so many things thanks to all Newt's letters before coming here but she would never think that it would be in these circumstances. She had always dreamed that he would invite her to stay with him for a few weeks or days to spend time together and know each other better. But here she was with this burden on her shoulders and this pain in the heart.

She had read all his letters during the trip to reassure her and to collect as many useful details as she could need. While she was reading them sit on a bench in sun on the deck, she could clearly hear his voice in his head, explaining how was town, streets and life here.

Now, she had put her suitcase down at her feet to take some time to think straight and to use her auror's instinct. She was going to go to the Ministry of Magic and ask to see Theseus Scamander, Newt's older brother. She didn't really know him and Newt had told her several times that they had a complicated relationship but for now he was the only person that she could rely on. She firmly grasped her suitcase and began to look for a little alley, place or street where she could apparate without being seen by a no-… _muggle_ , corrected Newt's voice in her head, which made her chuckle.

While she was walking, she didn't really pay attention to the buildings, the Londoners or anything else. She was focused on her aim. She spotted a little alley not far away with a little cavity where she could hide and apparate. A few seconds later, she stood in front of a brick wall with a red phone booth as Newt had described her in one of his letters telling her that this was the only way for visitors to enter. Then, she should present herself in the front desk for her wand's inspection. So, she did as he had told her. When she finally was in the hall, she was quite impressed by the atrium and these statues and all these windows overlooking desks. She stayed there looking all around. She was quite stunned; it was so different from MACUSA. She wore the same look than Newt when she took him in the Woolworth building the first time they met.

 _For the sake of Deliverance Dane, Tina, focus. You are not a tourist! The man you love is in a coma. You had to find his brother to help you,_ she chastised herself.

While she was walking to go to the Aurors' department, she got inside the elevator. When it began to move, she was astonished by the movements but thankfully she only was going to second floor. Finally, the machine stopped and she stepped outside. In front of her was a desk behind which sat a young and blonde witch who was filing her nails. Tina looked at her a little doubtful and came closer of the desk.

"Excuse-me. I am Porpentina Goldstein, an auror from MACUSA and I would like to see Theseus Scamander, the Head Auror, please."

The young woman didn't even look up.

"It is the fourth door to your left."

Tina sighed and took the direction indicated. Before knocking at the door, she deeply breathed, took her best auror attitude. _Here we are_ , she thought, _it is now or never_. She knocked on the door for a moment waiting for us to tell her to come in.

"Come in." Theseus curtly said .

She pushed the door open and found a rather large office with lots of shelves crumbing under books' weight. But all was very clean, organized and looked perfect but cold and soulless. Then she laid her eyes on the man who sat there. There were some similarities with Newt but they were not obvious. His hair was auburn but darker than Newt's, he also had some freckles but they were more understated and disparate. As for his eyes, they were not green but blue and distant . He was severe and inscrutable, there weren't any warmth and softness in his eyes and face, all the opposite of Newt. He was wearing a dark grey suit and a black tie on his impeccable white shirt. It gave him a strict look, which was perfect for his position.

"Good afternoon, may I help you?" He asked her without moving.

"Good afternoon Mr. Scamander. I am Porpentina Goldstein, an auror from MACUSA and a good friend of Newt." She spontaneously answered presenting him her identification card.

"Ah yes, I remember your name. Newt speaks about you on highly terms but why MACUSA has sent you? We haven't been aware of your arrival." He asked her startled.

"I am not here for work and MACUSA didn't send me. I came on my own with a no-m… muggle steamer because of Newt. How is he?" She dared to ask, dreading what he will tell her .

Theseus 's expression fixed upon her more sweetly. She could read the pain on his features.

"I don't know what you know but he is still not awake. We hope for that every day ever since he has been found by his assistant." He camly explained her with pain his voice .

 _Yes, of course, Bunty_ , she thought. Tina remembered some of Newt's letters where he had explained to her how precious Bunty was when he wasn't there. His creatures were in good hands, he had written to her.

"I want to see him, please. Can you tell me how I can go to the hospital and where it is ?"

"I will take you but I have to finish this first, if I may."

"All right, I will wait. If you don't mind, I will stay here and read while you are working." She offered.

"If that's what you want, I don't mind." He stated as he began to keep fulfilling his report.

Tina went to sit on the couch by the door and pulled Newt's book out and his letters of her suitcase. Neither of them talked. After an hour, a few knocks at the door startled them.

A beautiful woman with dark skin, magnificent silhouette and hair entered. She wore a black suit and a white shirt that perfectly fit her. She went straight to Theseus. Tina perfectly remembered her because of the picture that Newt had in his case the first time he came to New York. She immediatly recognised Leta.

"It is time to go, Theseus. We are already late and …"

"Leta!" He cut her off." I am not alone."

Then she abruptly turned and noticed Tina.

"I am sorry." She said ready to leave but Theseus took her by the wrist to hold her back.

So the light from the office made the engagement ring shine, Tina had a pinch in her heart. She instantly thought of Newt. He hadn't told her about his brother's engagement to Leta, his childhood love. She couldn't imagine how he had felt when he heard the news.

"Leta, this is Porpentina Goldstein, an auror and American friend of Newt. Miss Goldstein, this is my fiancée Leta Lestrange."

"It is nice to meet you, Miss Lestrange." Tina simply said.

"You too."

"We better get going if we want to have some time with Newt." Theseus said .

Tina flinched. She wanted to see him so badly but at the same time she didn't know what to expect.

They traversed the ministry without exchanging a word more. Theseus was leading the way until they arrived in the atrium and he went straight to the fireplace. He turned and said to Leta.

"You go first. Like this, the healers won't be surprise and Miss Goldstein …"

"Call me Tina, please." She cut him off.

"Tina will see what is like. "

Leta stepped inside the fireplace and green flames appeared taking to her to the destination. Theseus gently pushed her in the back and she entered. A few seconds later, she stepped out of another fireplace in a big white hall with a front desk behind which was The Welcome Witch who welcomed the patients. Leta was talking to her pointing out in Tina's direction. When she came back near Tina, she was dusting her coat and Theseus stepped out. This time, Leta leaded the way. Tina looked around her and she felt relieved not to be alone here. She would probably lose herself in all these hallways. Finally, they arrived in first floor: "Creature-induced injuries", she shivered as she read the label on the door. They kept walking until Leta stopped in front of the latest door in the right of the hallway. Theseus turned and looked at her.

"I think you would have to know what happened and what you will see inside. It is not very pretty. After his trip in Burkina Faso, Newt has brought a … "He hesitated searching for the right word.

" Runespoor. " Leta said to help him

" Newt has brought a runespoor back. He had begun to study him but it seems that after a few days, it was not very easy. The beast didn't react as he expected: she had bitten him on his right wrist while he was trying to avoid him. But his foot got caught in something, he fell and he hit his head pretty hard against a barrier from one of the pens. It's Bunty who found him a few hours later. He was running a fever, sweating and unconscious. He didn't open his eyes since then. The healers have tried their best to reassure us. They really take good care of him. They said he had not awakened yet because his mind and his heart are not ready yet, that he hasn't yet recovered . But I must confess that I am afraid. More than time passes, more I worry that he won't wake up. " He finished with some despair in the voice.

Leta had gone to sit a little further away to give them some privacy as they were talking. Theseus 's voice had tightened all along his explanation. Under his facade , Tina could clearly see his pain and how hard it was for him, how worried he was about his little brother . How she could understand him, she didn't know how she would react if something happened to Queenie.

"You go first and have some time with him. We are waiting for my parents and we will join you when they came."

As he left to join Leta, she grasped the doorknob, her hands were shaking and she couldn't restrain it. She pushed the door open and first she saw the whiteness of the room flooded by the celling light. She had not yet dared to turn to him. She dreaded the image that she will discover. She sharply inhaled and finally turned.

Newt was soundly asleep; his head was covered with a large bandage and his fringe covered a part of it. He was laying on his back, his arms over the blanket. He was very pale which made his freckles even more noticeable. A rather large purple-blue hematoma covered his right cheekbone. When she came closer, a hand covering her mouth as she was trying to contain her tears, she noticed two little holes on his wrist who were yet slightly red. It was probably the place where the runespoor had bitten him.

She sat herself the other side of the bed and imprisoned his left hand in hers. She placed a long and sweet kiss on the palm and put her cheek against it, closing her eyes. His hand was warmth despite the fact he was in a coma and this reassured her a little. But the tears that she was trying to hold back began to roll on her white cheeks. A thousand thoughts were going through her minds at the same time and she was lost.

After a few minutes, the spams calmed down. Then, without thinking, she began to talk to him.

"Please, Newt, you have to wake up. Your brother, Leta, your parents and me are worried sick about you. You can't stay like this much longer. Please, I can't live without you. I was a fool not to tell you how I felt about you in New York. My fear made me a coward and now that you are lying here, I am afraid that life won't give me the chance to tell you that: I love you, Newt Scamander, more than life itself and I don't know what I will do without you. I won't be able to forgive myself if I let go the only man I have ever really loved and who is the perfect man for me. So, come back to me and your family, I beg of you …"

Tears strangled her again but voices from the hallway came closer. Tina quickly got up and went near the window turning her back to the door to dry her tears searching for a handkerchief and compose herself before everyone entered.

When the door opened, she laid eyes on the parents of Newt. His father frowned while he was looking at her from head to toe. His mother, in the contrary, smiled. Theseus spoke up.

"Mother, father, this is Porpentina Goldstein, an auror from MACUSA and a very good friend of Newt."

Instantly, their mother came to her and took her hands in hers, sweetly speaking .

"Thank you for coming Miss Goldstein. You must care very much about my Newton if you have done such a long trip. Besides, he told us so many beautiful things about you since he went to New York and have met you.

Tina's cheeks turned crimson red.

"Thank you, Mrs. Scamander… It is very nice of you to say. I will leave and let you have some family time now." She muttered, quickly moving towards the door.

She walked away from the door so as not to be indiscreet and went to lean against a window sill. The weather was rainy and downpours flooded the magical streets of London. This rain was like the tears which were running. It couldn't stop. She felt like a stranger and so useless.

After a while, the whole family appeared and joined her.

"Thank you very much for your help, Mr. Scamander." She sincerely said to Theseus.

"I am happy to be able to help you. When are you going back to America?"

"I don't know. I will stay as long as it takes … " She firmly said.

Theseus burrowed his brow but didn't say anything about it.

"Have you a hotel room?" Leta nicely asked to her.

"No, I haven't taken the time to look for one, when I arrived, I went straight to the ministry. I think I will go now and find something. Maybe you can recommend a good address." She said a little ashamed not to have taken some time to organize these details.

"That's nonsense, you come home with us. You are Newt's friend, you are like family. Besides it is not a good idea to stay alone. Don't you think Theseus? "Leta kindly offered.

"Of course, Tina." He agreed.

"I don't want to impose and be a burden. You are working …"

"We won't accept no as an answer ". Leta added with a reassuring smile.

Then they said goodbye, went out of St Mungo and Theseus apparated them in the middle of a stunning living room where a piano stood.

"I will show you your room." Leta offered. "You are probably exhausted and want to settle. "

She opened the first door in the right in the hallway. It was a cozy bedroom with a big bed and a large French door with a stunning view on a park. Tina put her suitcase on the bed and looked through the window. A single image was running in her mind: Newt in his hospital bed and hurt.

_**To be continued …** _


	3. Part three: Stay

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Newt always is in coma. Tina has to make some decisions.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here is the last part .  
> Enjoy!  
> Thanks for reading and putting some kudos .  
> Leave a comment if you want 
> 
> Disclaimer: I am not J K Rowling so I don't own any of this except the idea of the story

The same routine has been established since Tina's arrival. Theseus and Leta were working the mornings and joined her for lunch. They were very kind to her and they all stuck together to support the waiting, ease the pain that each was feeling.  
Sometimes Tina went for a walk to clear her mind in a park nearby, but the beautiful view was always dull. She didn't manage to forget Newt's state and the pain she was feeling each day when she was going to see him. Her hope was the only thing that kept her sane. The afternoons, she stayed with Newt and the Scamander family would join her later. When she was alone with Newt, she was talking about Queenie and Jacob, reading aloud a book or the Daily Prophet, she was hoping that maybe he would hear her and that he would slowly come back to the world.  
Today was no exception. When she entered his room, pushing his fringe, she lightly kissed him on the forehead.  
She stayed like each day waiting for Theseus, Leta and Mr. and Mrs. Scamander. The healers regularly checked Newt's condition, but they never told her anything about his health as she wasn't family. It was frustrating but she had to make with it. Theseus and Leta often told her what the healers said to them but it seemed that Newt's and Theseus' father didn't really agree with that. Their mother, as for her, always was very nice and considerate with her.  
But when Theseus entered Newt's room this day, she felt that something was wrong. He seemed tense and he didn't look really comfortable.  
"Is there something wrong with Newt, Theseus?" She worriedly asked.  
"Not with Newt, Tina. Can I talk to you one-on-one ,please?"  
She got up and followed him in the corridor, drawing away from Newt's hospital room. He stayed a few meters away, turning his back on her.  
"I didn't know what the best way is to tell you that but something came in my office this afternoon from MACUSA." He explained to her while he was removing a folded paper from his jacket pocket. He hesitated before turning and handed it to her. She tensed at the name of her employer but she wasn't really surprised, she knew that this would happen sooner or later.  
She unfolded it, her hands slightly shaking. Then she read.

_Mr. Theseus Scamander, Head Auror office._

_Ms. Goldstein hasn't come to work in three days. I have told her myself what happened to your brother. Her sister, who is working for MACUSA too, is trying to protect her and told us about a supposed illness. I have no proof of the truth of this situation. But if my instinct doesn't get me wrong, I think she has found a way to come to England to see your brother to whom she seems very attached to. But feelings are not something which must interfere with her job. I think you understand that more than anyone else. So, if my suspicions are good and she is here with him. I gave her one last chance to be back in two days or I will disbar her from the list of American aurors despite the fact she is one of my best members._

_Best regards._

_Seraphina Picquery, President of MACUSA._

When she looked away from the letter, she was alone. Theseus, who was a respectful man, had slipped away to give her some space and some time for herself. She decided not to enter back to the hospital room, she preferred walking to clear her head. She was in a very delicate situation and she didn't really know what the best choice was. She was torn between her love for her job and her love for Newt: it was an important dilemma. Whatever her decision will be, she knew that she will suffer.  
So, she walked and walked for a long time without knowing where she was going. This path that she had taken was perfectly mirroring her life. She didn't know where she had to go. Finally, she found herself along the Thames in the muggle town. She sat on a bench and looked at the passers-by not knowing what to think or what to do.  
It was rather late when she went back to Theseus' and Leta's flat. She had decided to apparate on the doorstep not wanting to bother them more if she apparated inside. They had already done so much for her. As she stepped inside without a noise, she saw a shadow on the sofa, there was only one little table lamp which illuminated the room.  
"There you are, I was beginning to worry. We already have someone in a hospital bed, I think it is really enough." Theseus coldly said.  
She lowered her head, ashamed. She had totally forgotten about her hosts, only selfishly thinking about her own problems.  
"Do you want to talk about it?" He told her kindlier.  
"No, I will go to bed. Things always look better in the morning. But thank you, Theseus." She began to leave the living room.  
"You should eat something, eating nothing will not do any good. Leta has let something for you in the kitchen." He nicely added.  
"I am not hungry, really but thanks anyway." She whispered and quickly disappeared in her bedroom leaving Theseus, troubled.  
She put her pyjamas on and settle at the desk where she found a quill and a piece of parchment. The best thing she could do was to confess herself to her sister.

_**My dear Queenie.** _

_**I am writing to tell you not to keep trying to protect me in MACUSA. I couldn't thank you enough for doing it, but I don't want you to be in trouble because of me. Theseus, Newt's brother, has received a letter from Mrs. Picquery today. She knows you're lying about me, and I don't want you to lose your job because of me.** _  
_**She wants me back in two days or I will lose my job. When I am writing you this, my heart is torn between the love for my job and my feelings for Newt. It is a conflict of love and duty and I know, whatever my decision will be, that I will suffer, or I will hurt someone. I am really lost, and I don't know what to do, to such an extent that Theseus and Leta worry about me and they don't need this now. They already have enough in their plate with Newt's state which always is the same. I am more a burden for them than a help. I shouldn't have left like this on an impulse, it was not a good thing neither for them or for me.** _  
_**I am asking myself if it would be better if I came back now even if my heart fell into pieces when I think about leaving Newt.** _

_**I miss you, Queenie.** _

_**Love, Tina.** _

The tears were rolling on her cheeks while she had poured her heart out in this letter. Both had exhausted her. She let it on the desk to send it the next morning. She went into bed and instantly fell asleep.

As she entered the white room in St Mungo like each day since she had been there, she found Newt's bed empty. She looked around the hospital room but it was empty. Then something caught her eyes under the bed, some brown leather thing that she knew all too well. She grabbed it: Newt's suitcase. Instantly she knew where he was. But one question was on her mind. How did this case arrive here? She opened the lid and went downstairs.

The shed was empty, so she went out and find him here the hands in his pocket looking at his beasts, a little smile floating on his lips. Seeing him like this made her heart melt and she couldn't restrain herself, she ran to him clocking him up in her embrace. He was surprised but took her by the waist and steadied his feet. He put his face in her hair inhaling her sweet perfume as she hid her face in his chest, releasing all her sorrow. He didn't say anything, he just rubbed her back letting her calm down. After a few minutes, she extracted herself from his embrace to give some space and so she regained composure.  
"Oh Newt, I am so happy to see you awake. You gave us such a fright, you know. But you should be in your bed resting!" She exclaimed.  
"Tina, I am feeling good and you know better than anyone else that this case is my self-space when I am not in the best shape." He told a bit coldly.  
"Yes, I know. Anyway, we should go back to the hospital room and let the healers check on you and call your family who is worried sick." She said, surprised by his tone.  
He didn't answer right away, he seemed to debate on the best option.  
"Since how long am I sick?" He asked, surprised.  
"One of your new runespoors bit you, so you were poisoned, and you hit your head hard when you fell trying to avoid him. You stayed more than a month in a coma." She explained to him.  
"I see. Don't get me wrong, I am so happy that you are here but how did you manage to have more than a month of leave from MACUSA. it is a very long time and I am sure that the auror office and Mrs Picquery didn't want to let go one of their best auror for so long." He stated.  
She lightly lowered her head before she answered him.  
"I am here only since a few days. I didn't know about your accident. It is Mrs Picquery who told me, so I decided to come and instantly see you."  
"No one from my family wrote to you to tell you?"  
"No, but you can't blame them, Newt. I think they were so afraid for you; besides they just know my name because you told them a bit about me. But they have more important things to do and think about."  
He sighed but thought that she was probably right.  
"I think you should go home. I don't want you to lose your job because of me. Mrs Picquery won't give you another chance like last time. I have played my last card. I don't want you to resent me because of all this. So please, don't wait any longer and go home." His voice was like a blade thrust right in her heart.  
She was flabbergasted, tears began to burn her eyes. So, she turned, covered her mouth with her hand to prevent a cry. The pain she was feeling was so strong that she thought her heart would break. He didn't try to hold her back or anything. Her only thought was to run and hide herself. So, she did and went out of the suitcase. She fell on the hospital bed crying her heart out. His words were running through her mind and she didn't understand. She wasso sure he would be happy to see her and maybe they finally could confess their mutual feelings. The more she thought, the more it was hard for her to breathe. Her tears suffocated her. Suddenly, a distant voice called her.

Slowly she opened her eyes. her vision was blur and her mind had some hard time to calm and put the pieces of the puzzle together.  
"Calm down, Tina. That's all right. You're all right. You're safe." The voice sweetly said, caressing her hair. First, she believed it was Newt or more precisely she wanted that it was him.  
Finally, she recognized Theseus and the guestroom. She deeply sighed and sat against the headboard and hid her head in her hands, ashamed. She was feelbad and remembered what she had written to Queenie the evening before about the fact that she was a burden for Leta and Theseus. Here she was, crying like a mad woman because of a bad dream and he was here to comfort while he had already so many things to do and to think.  
"Do you want to talk about it? I think it would be better if you did. You will feel relieved after." He calmly encouraged her.  
"I dreamt about Newt. He was awake and was inside his suitcase with his beasts. He asked me to leave and go back to New York. He was so distant and cold, and it felt so real, Theseus. I am so sorry if I have woken you up. I should come home, I only am a burden for you both, Leta and you . I should have probably listened to Mrs President and not come. It is probably better if I get back where I belong." She sternly stated.  
"Don't say that. You are as important as any of us for Newt, Tina. It was just a bad dream. We are all very worried about him and our subconscious pulled ours strings. You have to know that I haven't seen Newt's eyes brighter or his face more lightened than when he talked about you. We surely haven't the best relationship but I want him to be happy and you make him very happy Tina, maybe more than anyone else except maybe his beasts." He explained to her with a light smile.  
She smiled in return.  
"Thank you, Theseus. I needed to hear that."  
"What will you do about MACUSA?"  
"I think I will stay here. Never mind! I have already lost my job once and they gave it back to me thanks to Newt. Before I met him, it was the most important thing for me, apart from Queenie. Now my priorities are very different. Newt needs me, and I don't intend to fail in my task to help him and be there when he needs me the most. I will manage to find something else. Don't worry. Thank you very much for all you have made for me.  
"You're welcome. I should go or I will be late. I see you this afternoon. Don't get worked up by then."  
She chuckled while he exited her room. This conversation had made her some good. She had almost forgotten about her dream and she was sure of what she wanted. It was settled: she was staying for Newt no matter what happened with her job, he was her priority. She had already infringed the law coming in England without her superior's permission anyway. So, she was neither here nor there. At this instant, she noticed that she had really changed since she had met him, and she was very happy about it. He had brought something very special in her life, something she thought she would never have, leaving her single all her life: love. But now she saw all her life through a new perspective thanks to him and the love she had for him.

The rest of the day was calm without any other incident. An owl was waiting for them when they came back from the hospital. Queenie had, of course, answered her right away.

_**My dear Tina,** _  
_**Don't worry about me, the most important is Newt for now. Mrs Picquery is not very insistent anyway, she has so many important things to do and care about, that she hadn't really time for me and they haven't any proof either.** _  
_**I think you shouldn't torment yourself like that. For once in life, you should let your heart guide you and not your head. Newt is a wonderful man and the perfect man for you. You must not slip him through your fingers, Teenie. You are the perfect match. Both of you deserve happiness and you are ready to give it to the other. You are a giver as much as he is, Teenie. I know he is the love of your life. So, you stay in London as long time as it is necessary. As for MACUSA, I am sure we will find something. For now, be selfish and think about your own happiness.** _  
_**I am fine and Jacob is here to take care of me. So, no need for you to worry about me.** _

_**Love you, Teenie.** _  
_**Send my love to Newt too.** _

_**Queenie.** _

The relief invaded her. She felt so lucky to have so many people who were there for her and care about her. She joined Leta and Theseus in the living room.  
"You seem better than this morning." Theseus noticed.  
"Yes, thanks to you and the letter I just received from Queenie."  
"That's good news." Leta added.  
"I can't thank you enough to all you have done for me already. I hope I will be able to return the favour one day but under happy circumstances. You have been so kind and understanding." She kindly said as she was looking at them in the eyes.  
"Maybe you should wait a little before to thank us because I have something more to tell you that will allow us some other acknowledgements." Theseus teased.  
Tina was on the edge of her seat.  
"One of my men needs a change and I think that going in America will do him some good. So, if you want to, I can offer an exchange to Mrs Picquery. He takes your place in MACUSA and you take his here at the Ministry of Magic. Unless you have a problem with being under my orders." He said with a smile playing on his lips.  
She stayed there not moving as if she had been petrified. He offered her the best present: all her problems were solved. There only was Queenie and Jacob. Once again, she would have to make a choice even if she remembered her sister's letter and that she already knew what she would tell her. She would want her to accept, like this, she could be near Newt for good and maybe they could begin a real life and a real relationship together. But for that, he would have to wake, and they must share their feelings for each other. There was a long way in front of her. She didn't see the end of the tunnel yet.  
Theseus got her out her reverie.  
"I want you to take some time to think about it. I know it is not an easy decision, especially since Newt is still in a coma and you can't talk to him but weigh the pros and the cons. I am not in a hurry. I will open the negotiations with Mrs. Picquery, like this we all have some time to organize all this." He willingly offered her.

* * *

_A few days later …._  
  
The healers had removed the bandage the day before. As she looked at him, his face seemed less white to her than the previous day. As she settled on the chair near his bed, she began to talk about his beasts. She had made acquaintance with Bunty the day before thanks to Theseus so, she could tell him some news. She knew that people would think that she was crazy to talk to him like this. But even if he couldn't answer or hear her, it was a relief for her.  
When she was telling him about another escape of the baby nifflers, who had created chaos in his menagerie again, a whisper was heard. She abruptly stopped in the middle of her sentence.  
"Tina…"  
"Newt! Mercy Lewis, you're finally awake. You gave us such a fright. How are you feeling?" She tenderly asked him while sat near him on the bed, taking his hand in hers to keep him calm and reassure him.  
She was on the verge of tears to finally see him awake.  
"It is like a hippogriff had trampled on me and my head is spinning but what are you doing here? Where am I exactly?" He hoarsely asked with a weak voice.  
"Shh. Don't panic, you are alright and in safe hands." She calmly answered while she stroked his hair. "You are in St Mungo. I will go fetch a healer and send a note to your family."  
"No. Stay, please."  
"You rest and they will check on you while I am gone. We will back before you know it." She stood up, kissed him on the cheek without thinking. His cheeks became red but she didn't notice, she had already left the room. She ran through the corridors and found the healers to whom she told the news. Then she entered the fireplace and went straight to the ministry to Theseus' office. She was running quick and didn't even bother to present or excuse herself. She burst into Theseus' office, discovering several aurors here with him. Instantly, he got up and came closer to her.  
"Tina, what is it?" He urged her.  
"He is awake, Theseus." She answered out of breath, the tears that she was holding since the hospital running on her cheeks.  
Theseus embrace her, his wonderful smile illuminated his face.  
"I'll take Leta and my parents to see him. You go back to him. We'll find you there." He stated. "We will finish this later." He told to the aurors with a dismissal tone.

She hurried back to St Mungo. When she entered the hallway of Newt's room, she saw the healers coming out. She began to walk more quickly. Before opening, she deeply inhaled and collected herself. Then she went in and found him up near the window. He turned smiling when he heard her as she urged to come closer to him. She could see that he was still weak, he wasn't very steady on his feet but it was so good to see him alert.  
"Why are you up? You should be in bed resting." She reprimanded him like a mother.

"Calm down, Tina. I have the healer's permission, they said it will do some good to my health after this long time in bed. I just need to be careful because I will probably be tired rather quickly though. I need to stretch my legs and my body too." He calmly explained to her.  
Then she didn't say anything and took him in her embrace, he instantly responded by taking her in his arms. All the twister of feelings that she was restraining since she arrived got out. He let her cry as long as she needed. He simply enjoyed her presence, her fragrance, her body against his. After a few minutes, he began to free himself.  
"I think it will be better if I go back to bed now." He weakly said.  
She smiled and took him by the waist to help him. Both of them were slightly red because of the gesture but they didn't say anything. After helping him to settle, she sat by him.  
"Since when are you here, Tina? "He asked her without looking directly at her.  
"I am here since a few days. I came as soon as I knew what happened to you. "  
"So that was you that I could hear, your voice was so far away, that have given me some comfort. But you shouldn't have bothered. It is a long trip and what about MACUSA. Mrs Picquery shouldn't be there happy about this."  
"I don't care about her. All was mattered to me is you. I think it is time to be sincere with each other. I could stand the idea of losing you. I can't live without you, Newt. I cursed myself not to have told you what I was feeling when I had the chance, after I had learned what happened to you. I won't let the chance to get away from me now. I am in love with you since we first met …"  
He didn't let her finish but captured her lips with his. He had chosen to take action rather than words, he was not good with them anyway and this kiss was worth more than a thousand words. Tina leaned a little to put her arms around his neck as he was deepening the kiss placing his left hand on her neck, his thumb caressing her cheek.  
They were interrupted by someone who was clearing his throat. They instantly parted, Tina quickly got up, her face was red much as Newt's. Leta and their mother lightly smiled, Theseus was exulting. Mr. Scamander had a blank face. Mrs. Scamander went to her son, sat on his bed and took him in her arms.  
"Oh, sweet Merlin, Newton …" She couldn't add any other word; the tears were making her voice hoarse.  
"I will give you some family time." She whispered to Theseus as she went toward the door.  
She left the hospital and got back to Leta's and Theseus' flat waiting for their return.

* * *

One week later, Tina found herself descending the marble staircase of the Scamander Estate, early in the morning. Mrs Scamander had ordered to her son to come home with them. The healers had let Newt come home the day before but with strict orders. So, she could keep an eye on him as he was recovering and she offered the young woman to come along. As she reached the living room, green flames appeared in the fireplace, Theseus got out of it.  
"Good morning, Tina." He greeted her. "It is good you're here because I wanted to talk to you." He added more seriously.  
"Good morning Theseus. It is about Mrs Picquery and MACUSA, isn't it?" She asked a little worried.  
He nodded and invited her to sit with him on the blue velvet sofa with him.  
He was direct.  
"She wants your answer tomorrow night. You have to take a decision."  
She sighed lowered her head. She had pushed aside this to concentrate all her might on Newt. But she hadn't dared to speak with him about it yet. Of course, they had shared their feelings but she didn't really know what she could do. She certainly wanted to be with him but at the same time there was her sister. She wasn't really sure that she could leave her by herself. There was the problem with Jacob, she can't marry him in America, however she could perfectly understand that Queenie didn't want to give up on the love of her life. So, there she was again, torn between her love life and her family now.  
Theseus could see how hard this decision would be.  
"My offer still stands, Tina. I will be more than happy to have you in my team. Talk with Newt. It is the best thing you could do." He stated. "I have to go, call me when you will have decided. Have a good day until then."  
"Thank you, Theseus. "

After his departure, her appetite was gone, she could feel that her stomach ached. So, she opted for a walk in the garden, some fresh air would probably help her to think straight.  
An hour later, as she was sitting on a bench her knees under her chin, she heard someone coming. She wasn't surprised to see that it was Newt.  
"Good morning, Tina." He sweetly said placing a kiss on her forehead.  
"Good morning." She whispered as she leaned against his shoulder as he sat close to her.  
He frowned.  
"What is the matter? What's bothering you?  
She deeply sighed.  
"I have a decision to make and it is not an easy one. Whatever my decision is, it will have a big influence in my life. Mrs. Picquery didn't want me to come here, I came without her permission. When she found out, she gave me an ultimatum: I go back or I lose my job. Thankfully, your brother helped me and stalled for time offering me a place in his team in exchange with one of his men who needs a change. I mostly am torn because of Queenie." She explained to him. "I have to give her an answer tomorrow."  
Newt took her hands in his and squeezed them.  
"I will respect your decision whatever it is, Tina. But I won't lie: for some selfish reasons I want you to stay. I love you more than you could imagine and I don't want you to leave. But I perfectly understand that your sister is as important as I am in your life. So, if you decided to go then we will find a way to make our relationship work."  
He hadn't look at her during his long sentence but she knew that it costed him much to say all that. She was amazed by the fact that he was ready to sacrifice himself for her happiness. She didn't know what to say to him, she was out of words.  
They stayed silent like this for a few minutes. Newt had put his arm around her and she enjoyed his warmness as they were thinking about their problem.  
Suddenly Newt got up in a hurry from the bench and put Tina on her feet.  
"We could ask to Queenie and Jacob to come and live here. It would solve all their problems about being a muggle and a witch. They could live here without to be forced to hide and have a beautiful marriage. I am sure we can find a job for Queenie at the ministry and Jacob can easily open another bakery here near Diagon Alley." He said with enthusiasm.  
Of course, why didn't she think about that earlier? She was quite sure that Queenie would love the idea of living here. Jacob would probably be delighted to follow Queenie and meet with his friend Newt. After all, they finally hadn't anything to hold them back in New York.  
"Will you stay, Tina?" He pleaded.  
"Yes, Newt. I will because I can't live without you and i love you ."

"i love you too."  
He took her in his strong embrace and deeply kissed her as if it was their last kiss.

_**The End.** _


End file.
